I stood at the sink facing the mirror terrified at the unfamiliar face looking just as terrified back at me. It had been a long while since the two of us had spoken to one another.
Looking ahead and bending down I tried desperately to wash the taste of last night’s truths from my mouth. The bitter taste like the leftovers from a heavy meal had thickly coated my tongue and I used it as an excuse not to speak.
I continued to look I hated what I saw had always hoped of being more still I wanted nothing to do with the truth. What had I done to find myself here, alone, and disgusted? There was nothing to say.
Apologies seemed so vain; so futile, such a waste of time. Yet, I needed to speak the words, I owed you that much. I struggled to look again at you, still a stranger, still demanding answers from me. “I’m sorry!” There just a whisper but the slight flinch told me that you’d heard.
“I’m sorry.” A little louder this time. You didn’t believe it, neither did I since I was never one to apologize. Never one to back down or step up…it was a fact, my fact. My truth right there in front of me and I couldn’t deny it.
I’ve treated you poorly. I was supposed to be your best friend and you mine. I denied you and mistook you for the enemy shooting first and watching you fall dead at my feet. “Please forgive me!” I shouted, and my tears filled the sink before me. Blood and tears, tears, and blood…mine, yours, ours.
I faced you the terror fading but still present. I saw the slight relief on your face too. This had been long overdue, and it felt good to talk again. I love you and I need you now more than ever to be my sister, my confidante, and my best friend…again.
Let’s keep in touch.
Photo credit: JD Mason for Unsplash
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